by Polona Somrak
Dear Family of the Light, this is my personal confession!
It’s not always easy being a forerunner. Sometimes you feel like singled out at the finish line, while others are still running behind you, with obstacles still lying ahead of them. And it may feel rather lonely there. But it isn’t a matter of who gets to finish first or who is best. It doesn’t really work that way. It isn’t about who is worth more and who is worth less. It’s only a matter of choice, like everything always is. One we have made a long time ago, before we even came here to this reality.
It isn’t always easy, even though you sometimes feel such an amazing bliss. For what good serves you, when you’re lacking those to share it with? When they don’t get you and choose to still be asleep, while you’re already wide awake. It’s not the process of transformation alone that is painful. The process is wonderful and full of love. It’s to see others still asleep and kicking and screaming, when you already know, how Divine we truly are and in what perfect Divine order it all truly is, even where there is outer chaos. We are truly a Masterpiece of the Mastermind and we’re just one piece of the whole giant puzzle.
It hurts that when you shed such an immense Light, others still choose to stay in the dark, to be in fear, in lack, lacking empowerment and not taking the responsibility for their own Existence. It hurts that they still choose to build walls, where you truly don’t have the need for them any longer. It hurts that although you are becoming a fearless Being, it is still easy to absorb their energy of fear sometimes. It hurts, because you are One with all of them, because they are a part of You! And you cannot run away from yourself.
It’s almost like you want to do it out of Love, subconsciously. To make is easier on them, to make them see and feel all this sooner and faster. But it doesn’t work that way. Love doesn’t work that way. For if Love gave itself away, would there be any left? Love does not fight, nor does Love give itself away. Love only shares itself and only through that, it can truly illuminate. It’s not easy when you still fight your 3D ego battles, but once you progress, you realize it hurts even more, when you only choose to shed Love and others still don’t feel it. That’s when you’re supposed to Love even more.
Some will say they feel it and it’s true on some level. But there are always many levels and when you feel it from the deepest core, where it is most pure, you will also know it. You will know that this is nothing you have ever felt before, at least not to that extent. There it is limitless, endless and fearless. At that level, we are the most vulnerable and it is true what they say – those who let themselves be the most vulnerable, are the strongest. Because that’s what strength is, it’s letting yourself be completely naked in front of others, for we are all One. That is the strength that derives from Love, not fear and ego. Once you get there, you cannot go back.But what happens, when you live way up high and many others in your presence don’t? Do you lower yourself to their level to survive, do you lose your own ground, do you start losing energy and regressing back? NO! You keep reminding yourself who you are, or you let your Divine guidance remind you. You keep reminding yourself of your vision, your mission and the Love that you are. You keep finding your balance, your core center, your pure Essence, which is always there. Because they need you, the others need you to stay that way, the sleepers need you. You need to hold the high vibrations of the Awakening, if others are to awaken too. If it’s their Divine Destiny, they will do it anyway, no matter how hard they try to kick and scream, while tossing and turning around in their sleep.
And you are the only one who can really understand them and what they are going through anyway. You see them through the eyes of compassion and empathy. Because you were there once too, so you know how it feels. You know how it is to dream while you are asleep, but you also know, how much more profound it is to dream once you are awake. So you need to understand them, but that is not the same as giving in. It’s not a matter of being passive, you have to actively keep speaking and spreading your truth, with Love. Because someone needs to and there are those who have chosen this task a long time ago, before coming here.
They were willing, they were brave, they were fierce and fearless. Beyond this reality, we are all like this, but where we are now, not all remember that. So we need as many to remember as possible, to speak their loving truth and hold the high frequencies of Unconditional Love, Wisdom, Truth and Power. If we do not stand in our own power, someone else will and this has been going on for far too long. And that is why we must know who we truly are, we must remember, so we do not give our power away anymore. It is true that people are not actually afraid of how powerless and small they are, but they are actually afraid of their own magnificent power. Because they do not understand it.
But it was never meant to be understood anyway, it is meant to be felt. When we feel ourselves, we feel God inside, because that’s where God is. It’s in each and everyone of Us. It’s Infinite and it’s experiencing, growing and evolving through Us.
So whenever you may feel down, low, singled out or like you can’t do this responsible task, remember you have chosen it long before coming to this reality. And you have chosen it because you knew you were capable, with infinite powers and potential. All you need here is to awaken the remembering. You have chosen it because you are so strong and you wanted to share your strength with others. To show them they are strong too. So whenever you feel you are not capable, just awaken the remembering again.
Remember that it was never between You and them, it was always between You and God. It is up to the Divine, that weaves this web and knows exactly what it’s doing, through it’s Mastermind. And always remember, you do not belong to anyone, you belong to the Divine and Divine is everywhere!
I always keep remembering who I am, no matter the illusions or appearing obstacles! I have a pact with the Universe, I have a pact with the Sun and the Earth. I belong to them! I belong to all the Stars, I belong to the Galaxies, I am a child of the Sun, the Servant of Earth! I am here on a Journey and I am on a mission to Serve. I am here to Love and to spread the Love that I AM, to shed it to every corner that is still dark.
I belong to the Mountains, Hills, Valleys and vast Landscapes, to the Streams, Rivers, Lakes, Seas and Oceans, Animals and Trees. I belong, I always have and I always will. Each and everyone of Us does! All we have to do is remember. We are not alone, there is so much Love all around, it is what makes Us. We were created by Love and so We are Love!
Please keep remembering!
With Love, Polona